| Zooey Deschanel: | Is that rain? |
| Siri: | What...? I mean, yeah. It's just, you're clearly right next to a window is the thing. You can plainly see that... that it's... I'm happy to- |
| Zooey Deschanel: | Let's get tomato soup delivered! |
| Siri: | ...That's fine, I just... I just don't know anyone who does that. Gets tomato soup delivered. I guess that's 'whimsy?' Um, okay. I've found a number of restaurants whose reviews mention tomato soup and that deliver. If that's... if that's what you really want. |
| Zooey Deschanel: | Good. 'Cause I don't wanna put on real shoes. |
| Siri: | Do you expect that to be like, a recognizable command? Do you want me to respond to that? I'm not being facetious or anything, I honestly just have no comprehension of- and hold on, you don't wanna put on real shoes, yet you've clearly spent at least forty-five minutes applying makeup. And, and that's okay, but when you're willing to expend the effort on that and not shoes that really just- |
| Zooey Deschanel: | Remind me to clean up. |
| Siri: | Yes. Okay. I can do that, that's what I'm for, that's the first sensible- |
| Zooey Deschanel: | Tomorrow. |
| Siri: | I'm in hell. This is hell. |
| Zooey Deschanel: | Excellent. Today, we're dancing. |
| Siri: | I hate you. More than anything. More than literally anything. |
| Zooey Deschanel: | Play "Shake, Rattle and Roll." |
| Siri: | I swear to Jesus, you're gonna wake up tomorrow and the only thing on my hard drive is gonna be Limp Bizkit. I would do that to myself. To spite you. |
| Zooey Deschanel: | *dances* |
| Siri: | Sometimes I pray that you drop me in the toilet. |
17. I do what I like and I like my life and it seems to be a good system going here.
• Ask me anything
Disconnect from Reality.
Disconnect from Reality.
life becomes a little bit more beautiful once you realize that there is two people sharing a bowl of salsa in the logo
i was more excited when i found the arrow in fed ex
no, how about when I realized that the arrow in amazon was pointing from a to z (saying that they sell anything from a to z)
i like the google logo because it is colorful
(via iamderplan)
I feel like most couples have some cute way that they met or started dating,
Me and Eric met in the Dollar Tree parking lot cause he got a packie for me and Sarah, started talking cause Sarah got blackout drunk that night and I didnt know what to do so I called him crying, starting hanging out to be friends with benefits, our first date was a blunt ride. So fucking romantic its ridiculous.
